tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post7830613805366226990..comments2008-11-15T20:30:40.703-06:00Mrs. Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10290710205666831891noreply@blogger.comBlogger54125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-79739105743609288832008-11-15T20:30:00.000-06:002008-11-15T20:30:00.000-06:00You might like John Rosemond's book: Six Point Plan for Raising Happy, Healthy Children. It goes into detail about the TV issue.Aliciahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141273769015234014noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-15951523252233888712008-11-14T05:45:00.000-06:002008-11-14T05:45:00.000-06:00I'm with Courtney and Glamorous. You are a good mom! Remember that bit. We watch TV in our house and none of this cold turkey business would work for us. I balance the guilt by turning it off after 30 minutes in the morning and it doesn't come back on until I am cooking dinner. If I break that rule in the day I try to use educational DVDs as we don't have PBS in the UK. We liked Baby Einstein when they were little and Little Einsteins now. Dinner and evening time it's a free for all because everyone's tired by then. We also run our boys ragged in the day with craft and physical activity as my youngest (4)has so much energy it's scary.cowgirl in wellieshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07661041010279248377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-35065297429689611612008-11-14T00:04:00.000-06:002008-11-14T00:04:00.000-06:00Relax. <BR/>TV is not the devil. <BR/>Try some leapfrog dvd's - they are great. Let her watch when you need it. <BR/>Some children can play by themselves, some just don't have the talent. <BR/>This from a mother of 7.<BR/>I love TV.<BR/>My two oldest are at BYU with scholarships; all chldren well rounded and they watch TV! <BR/>We talk about the TV we watch.Julie/momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04875123078040968827noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-6153639836901959022008-11-13T23:11:00.000-06:002008-11-13T23:11:00.000-06:00I have a 25 month old son, and we haven&#39;t introduced TV yet, but I do have a suggestion. My son loves dessert/candy, so we&#39;ve set up a rule where he can have dessert after dinner everyday (he gets to pick a little treat). Anytime he asks for a sweet, I tell him he is welcome to have dessert after dinner. He hardly ever asks for a treat during the day because he knows he won&#39;t get it. I think at their age, &quot;linking&quot; routine things together is very effective (it goes without saying that it is essential to be very, very consistent). So, if you decided she could watch 2 shows per day, you could link them to something else she does consistently (after breakfast - allowing you to shower &amp; after afternoon snack, for example). I hope that helps. Your Miss Dub is an absolute doll.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-64210889054960333382008-11-13T17:11:00.000-06:002008-11-13T17:11:00.000-06:00my 2 year old is a tv junkie too. The first words out of his mouth when he wakes up are "TeeBee? Turn it on!" I love the tv. It's the greatest invention ever. He won't play by himself. The tv talks to him, sings to him, dances with him, and plays games with him. Without it we would die. I am sure of it. We spend tons of time out of the house doing all the kinds of things you do. But there are more hours in the day than I can handle interacting with a little person.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-64031246129917197842008-11-13T15:28:00.000-06:002008-11-13T15:28:00.000-06:00I started reading all of these since I am guilty of the very same thing, but there are too many. Forgive me if I am repeating something already said. I have a 3 year old and a 1 1/2 year old. They love TV, sadly. My older child LOVES his learning leapster (so again, staring at the TV). I didn't feel guilty until I read your post. Haha ... that's not totally true - I just put it at the back of my mind. <BR/><BR/>I do have to tell you this - and this isn't me bragging or just being a parent who thinks that they have a genius for a child. My son is SMART. He is 3, right. He knows his alphabet, can identify the letters when seeing them, can type his name, knows his colors and shapes and has a VERY vivid imagination. He talks in complete, adult type of sentences. Granted, he can't use a fork or a spoon to save his soul, but that's neither here nor there. ;) <BR/><BR/>My point is - he is way ahead of the game learning wise. And I *gasp* let him watch TV. More than I should. I am just trying to make you feel better ... it hasn't hurt his brain :)Sarahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18201540282735408617noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-64993219328004598792008-11-13T12:53:00.000-06:002008-11-13T12:53:00.000-06:00You're a great Mom. You've got a great kid. She's developmentally advanced but not future-mensa, grad-school-at-12-kookie (no offense to the gifted and overachievers, but I think they make most of us mere mortals uncomfortable and happy to be ordinary). She's happy, verbal, and social. She's the first and currently only child, so she demands and gets more of your time and there are limited opportunities for her to interact with others in the home.<BR/><BR/>Moderation is important, much that media (of all kinds) offers is mind-numbing at best and evil at worts, but TV is not the devil and no child is going to be intellectually, morally, or socially destroyed from watching too much children's educational TV (even if the quality, per a new study, has apparently gone down the past 20 years). <BR/><BR/>Lots of great comments on both sides, but, as you would expect (maybe it's my SoCal roots), I lean more towards the free will, less structured side, than the overregulated or toss the TV side. I mean, if you toss the TV how do you watch football games and we all know if sports weren't heavenly ordained "the BYU" wouldn't dump so much money and effort into them (you can save that for another HTT, especially if the DHs of your regular readers are lurking).P Daddyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00609248296715599359noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-15297356236033703862008-11-13T08:59:00.000-06:002008-11-13T08:59:00.000-06:00Get rid of the TV!!! We don't have one, don't plan on getting one, and my kids will never by TV junkies.Pagehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11631184031349121676noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-12147485039646827262008-11-13T08:13:00.000-06:002008-11-13T08:13:00.000-06:00My second had a bit of a HUGE TV obsession around that age, and some of it was circumstantial, and some of it was me just letting it happen. What I did was make mini-goal to myself, and then try to meet them - no shows before lunch, only one show during the late afternoon slump. What I found with him was that if he watched something earlier in the day, he spent a LOT of the rest of the day asking to watch more, more, MORE. BUT, if I kept things going for him earlier in the day, he started to just get carried away with what he was doing, and eventually stopped noticing he wasn't watching. We got down to one movie/WEEK, and I think that's perfect, for us.<BR/>My other theory that goes along with this is that sometimes if you give your kids a void, they just learn how to fill it. If, for instance, it was your routine to do a few household jobs in the morning, then I would do one of two things - give her a rag and let her dust or clothes and let her fold (things all my kids have liked at that age), or tell her mommy has to get ________ done before we _________, so she can do something by herself. (For her age, I'd give 3 options, ex. read some books on the couch, play with dollies in your room, or do some puzzles)<BR/><BR/>That's my long-winded explanation of what I do!little mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01484272063098720924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-54298849634458219842008-11-13T01:25:00.000-06:002008-11-13T01:25:00.000-06:00Uh...I don't know the answers to any of those questions. What I do know, is that it sounds like E takes after her cousin Max. Which means I completely understand and empathize. It's like my momma says, "sometimes you just have to get through the day."acte gratuithttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11168815832920494463noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-23573296527976048592008-11-13T00:55:00.000-06:002008-11-13T00:55:00.000-06:00I enjoyed reading all of those comments! Here are my thoughts to add to the mix...<BR/><BR/>I know you're talking about maybe moving to a cheaper apartment. I will say that taking a shower got MUCH easier after we moved into the house (because there are two floors rather than just one) and Eli's options were more limited - we have the stairs gated and his only form of entertainment is basically to play with the few toys in his room or read books - he almost always pulls a million books off the shelf and looks at the pictures while I enjoy a LONG shower. So for you - maybe you could bring some books into the bathroom w/ Miss Dub and close the door so that she's in there reading while you shower. Maybe it's a lame suggestion though, I don't know. <BR/><BR/>Second thing - you should start coming to playgroup on Wednesdays! Today was at the church and it was chaotic, but fun. <BR/><BR/>Third thing - I really try to keep the tv off when Eli's awake. I read a great book on child development (Bright from the Start) and wrote a quick review of it here: http://severson.blogspot.com/2008/05/great-child-development-book.html - but it really convinced me to keep the tv-watching to a minimum, especially while Eli is a toddler. <BR/><BR/>But I'm not saying he's never watched tv - and who knows if all of this will change when the next baby arrives in a few months and I have some desperate moments... we'll see!Sarah Shttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03202723986473508271noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-69174886160812188242008-11-12T22:47:00.000-06:002008-11-12T22:47:00.000-06:00Could I have had any more typos? Geez, I hope you got the gist. And I made it sound like I don't play with her ever. I do. She loves books too. So, no one call CPS on me...Lesliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12916814141218167919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-70573298763431681442008-11-12T22:45:00.000-06:002008-11-12T22:45:00.000-06:00I'm late, I know. I hope your still reading. <BR/><BR/>I think people worry too much about television. I watched a TON as a kid because I had 10 older siblings who liked certain "shows" and can you also imagine the me time my mom needed? Every day after Kindergarten I would come home, sit in front of the TV, my mom would bring my tray, and i'd eat my lunch. I remember playing a lot too of course but when I went to school I never had a problem sitting still etc. <BR/><BR/>I think if you let your kid sit there ALL DAY LONG that is one thing. But, it doesn't sound like you are doing that. I mean, seriously... Did you say you play with her FOUR HOURS a day? That is longer than I sit and play with my 2 year old! I'm just not one of those Moms and I agree with what someone else said. Some Moms think they have to be a freaking camp director. <BR/><BR/>I believe in quality over quantity. My daughter LOVES Maggies and The Ferocious Beast, Dora, Diego, and The Wonder Pets. She learns A LOT from these shoes believe it or not. The other day she pointed to a car and said "Mommy, Yellow car?" And she was right. I wondered how she got that and when she was watching a DVR'd ep of some show they were saying "What color is the car?" It was YELLOW. So is television really that bad? <BR/><BR/>I do turn it off though. I don't stress but I get sick of her staring at it and/or begging for it. Plus I can tell she's getting wiggly and she doesn't sleep well if she watches it all day. <BR/><BR/>Here's my schedule (just so you don't feel too bad.) We wake up, eat breakfast at the table. She watches her shows while I take care of her little sister. Then I get showered and/or clean the big stuff I need to. At about 10:00 I turn it off. I open the door to the backyard and tell her she HAS to play outside. She whines somtimes but if I just do laundry and ignore her she'll wander in her room or outside and play. Then we eat lunch around noon and to get her settled down I let her watch a show. Just one. When she wakes up, I let her watch another one because she takes awhile to wake up. I turn it off after that show. She plays and then when it is time to make dinner, she gets to watch it again. That is the last show for the night. <BR/><BR/>Sometimes we go places, sometimes I color or have activities for her, sometimes she plays with friends or cousins. It's not ALWAYS like that but if I am home all day and need to get stuff done the TV is my friend. It's the only way I get the house clean/dinner cooked/my hair washed...whatever. And she is still smart. According to her pedi, she is ahead in language and motor skills. She is well adjusted and a pleasant child to be around. <BR/><BR/>So, I wouldn't stress. It seems like you are trying and I think the fact that you are even concerned about it and making an effort speaks volumes about what kind of parent you are. In my opinion, from reading your blog, I think you rock as a Mom!Lesliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12916814141218167919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-68178277748537057772008-11-12T16:55:00.000-06:002008-11-12T16:55:00.000-06:00You're a really good Mom :)sarahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16722929618690197732noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-1357723373171923362008-11-12T16:42:00.000-06:002008-11-12T16:42:00.000-06:00are you still reading....?<BR/><BR/>My first born was an only child until she was 3... and also one who needed to be entertained constantly. She also climbed out of her crib at 14 mos. busting her lip and gums and that was the end of the crib. I'll leave you to guess how well naps or "don't-interrupt-me-it's-quiet-time" worked after that. Not well.<BR/><BR/>My advice, don't beat yourself up over it.<BR/>The DVR is great b/c my current 3 year old loves Caillou (who makes me crazy at times, but whatever) and I let her watch it about, oh, 3 times a day.<BR/><BR/>Of course when the TV in our master bedroom got unplugged (the 13incher that we got in the first place for me to watch the SLC winter olympics on while I was sick during my first trimester of pregnancy and my husband was in his first year of med school= bored sick pregnant woman. hows that for runonsentence) My husband couldn't muster up the gusto to plug it back in, and that was the end of that, until the office came back on, then we plugged it back in.<BR/><BR/>case in point. try unplugging it and that might deter her for a while. cold turkey is really good, ya know.tarahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16414824050569258795noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-10515173005973764052008-11-12T16:12:00.000-06:002008-11-12T16:12:00.000-06:00Holy Comments Batman!<BR/>Yeah, I'm pretty much in the same boat as you...I enjoyed all the comments.Emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12853823035553929416noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-58106547830496472622008-11-12T15:34:00.000-06:002008-11-12T15:34:00.000-06:00I can't tell you how much I enjoyed today's post. I have seriously been milling over this issue for weeks now and all of the tips here have given me some serious motivation and inspiration. Seriously, Mrs. Dub...your blog is the best.Clarissa Meeganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08958290479623619075noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-27569353695005614432008-11-12T15:12:00.000-06:002008-11-12T15:12:00.000-06:00A lot of great comments. My 2-year-old loves educational kids' shows and Disney movies too, and it really is a great break for me sometimes, but I've learned that it's ok to say no to it and that she really does get over it. The interesting theme I keep seeing here is that kids seem to get better at playing independently and are more pleasant to deal with when the TV is taken away, so maybe I should try it. (Right now she wants constant interaction with me, all day long.)<BR/><BR/>I don't have any new advice to share, but I'm interested to see what you decide to do. Keep us updated!JenSwenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03945207007011626429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-47194175580014507492008-11-12T14:32:00.000-06:002008-11-12T14:32:00.000-06:00Wow everyone has an opionion about this! I am in your same exact boat. Some days I get frustrated with the hours of just having it on and unplug the T.V. and my 23 month old has a complete meltdown and then throughout the day she will push the power button. For some reason it reminds me of a lab rat waiting for cheese that never comes. And its sad. And shes grumpy. Sometime when I care more I will be back to read all the suggestions of your readers.randa_joyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13762737188214475334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-22871511639567393592008-11-12T13:57:00.000-06:002008-11-12T13:57:00.000-06:00I have a 20 month old and am headed down the way to havin' a baby.. I wish my 20 month old WOULD WATCH A SHOW.. but, if I leave the room he is after me. Mostly, he just wants to be in my grill. Oh well. I would say go cold turkey. My routine for my TV addicted 5 year old is, " Go clean your room, and then you can watch tv" He gets in his room, starts playing with toys and comes back upstairs. I say, Is your room clean? His reply is "no" and I send him back down. That works for HOURS!!!! ;)Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10868678035006728581noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-36386591731855431562008-11-12T13:42:00.000-06:002008-11-12T13:42:00.000-06:00I'm no help. Hayden doesn't like TV unless its football. I wish I could get him to sit and watch a little more TV so I could get something done.Young Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13916087697667066805noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-37744109129906850552008-11-12T12:58:00.000-06:002008-11-12T12:58:00.000-06:00Once more: it got way better when we had another baby and that baby was more than 9 months old. Then they played together and it was wondrous to my eyes. They are a little more than 3 years apart, if that helps you gauge things.Azúcarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13859567470814286102noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-61478768758886778932008-11-12T12:55:00.000-06:002008-11-12T12:55:00.000-06:00p.s. I do the same as Courtney: I DVR his shows and leave the channel on something boring. That way when the show is over, they have to go back to watching local news, or Algebra 110 on the adult learning channel. Removing any kind of "Coming up NEXT!" on the kids stations, even Sprout or regular PBS, is helpful in controlling the amount she watches.<BR/><BR/>And I lied about spending an hour a day playing. I don't, unless you lump reading into playing. Call me old fashioned, but I don't want to play with my child for 4 hours a day because I'm not his friend, I'm his mom. <BR/><BR/>Interacting, having them clean with you, or help get things together for dinner, or shopping is fine. <BR/><BR/>He can entertain himself; it fosters his imagination.Azúcarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13859567470814286102noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-59491033954422684422008-11-12T12:40:00.000-06:002008-11-12T12:40:00.000-06:00I don't have tv, but my miss has a similar addiction to "shows" in movies that we have. I just tell her no after a movie or two every day. <BR/><BR/>I think it helps when I take her to "storytime" at the library. Since it sounds like you visit friends every day maybe you could have a story group or something. I feel like the social interaction helps fill her need for entertainment and she's able to play happily by herself more in the afternoons. Then again every child is different. Best of luck.Jenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12809081257616119677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8356738648955059801.post-58615071949609226402008-11-12T12:31:00.000-06:002008-11-12T12:31:00.000-06:00We struggle with this at our place too. We recently went cold turkey. Cold turkey! I have to say, as rough as it was the first two days, it was fine after that. Not only that, but his entire demeanor changed. He was calmer, less prone to fits, and entertained himself more readily.<BR/><BR/><BR/>How much time do I spend playing with him? Like maybe an hour a day, tops. I've got housework to do in the morning, then I'm at work in the afternoon, then cooking and serving dinner. He's a little older now and is OK to play by himself or with his brother. <BR/><BR/>Realistically? I'd let a 2 year old watch two shows a day. We got into the habit of more than that when I had morning sickness and never stopped. Then I had a new baby and needed to sleep. <BR/><BR/>Hey, the TV is there as a tool. It's OK to use it sometimes if you have to, just be ready to be hardhearted enough to take it away.Azúcarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13859567470814286102noreply@blogger.com