Time to talk bloodsuckers.
Specifically, time to review the movie version of "Twilight." Haven't heard of it? Um, welcome to 2008. Barack Obama is going to be the next president and sunglass lanyards are officially out.
If you haven't read or seen the movie, you might want to leave now, because (SPOILER ALERT!) Edward is a vampire. And Bella is one of the most pathetic protagonists to ever capture the youthful hearts of America. But we all want them to make sweet pasty love, so we love them regardless.
I went with a friend to see "Twilight" last week. Both my sisters had already seen it and dubbed it cringe-worthy, so I went with very low expectations. And I still couldn't stop feeling embarrassed. It was so uncomfortable for me. The dialogue seemed cryptic, the scenes seemed redundant, the pace seemed choppy and the special effects were weak. I actually liked the cinematography, but I kept wishing a new story would take place in Forks. One where the characters don't fall desperately in love for no other reason than one is hot and the other smells good. (No offense, Bells, but the hotness gets old after a few years. Hope you have some good conversation to fall back on.)
Kristen Stewart did a better job than I expected. Robert Pattinson's "I love you so much, it hurts, like, really, really bad" faces made my audience laugh a few times. And his hair? I mean, shouldn't vampires try to keep a lower profile?
Some of the other casting felt off, along with the white makeup that appeared to be stuck in actors' hair at times. And Jacob's wig was really bugging me, as well as the inexplicably diverse and accepting student body at Forks High.
So here's my review: Awkward.
It wasn't bad, just not good. And while I've tried and tried to peg the problem on the film's indie budget, I think it boils down to a thin plot.
I like Stephenie Meyer. She seems like a nice person. I like that she loves her characters and seems centered despite her explosive fame. But I didn't loooove her books - haven't brought myself to read the last one yet - and I think that's why I didn't like the movie. Because it's just like the books, and the books were a little awkward for me, too.
But if you are a Twilight lover, feel no shame. You're not alone. People loved the movie and the books. Shoot, grown women are throwing themselves at Bobby "Big Hair" Pattinson. And that's just creepy.
Did you/will you see "Twilight"?
If yes, did you like it or loathe it?
Spare no gory detail, my friends.
p.s. Head over here for more hot stuff.
02 December 2008
HTT - Twilight Edition
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51 comments:
for years i've had a tough time with fiction. if i'm going to do it, it's got to be really good. i did the secret life of bees and the kite runner, and really enjoyed those. but when twilight came out, i didn't even think twice about it. like smoking and drinking and drugs in highschool, while everyone else was desperate to understand how i could survive without them, i just had no desire. and so, i haven't read them. and although i have numerous friends who have tried to convince me, i just know i won't get passed the first chapter without wanting to throw things.
so when my sister-in-law, who is also not inclined to read things like twilight but managed to get sucked in somehow, called to see if i wanted to come to the movie with her and her friends, i thought about it. i went online and watched the trailers in an effort to convince myself, and all that did was reinforce the fact that it really is a book/movie about vampires. teen vampires. flying, tree climbing, apparently sexy, possibly "i only suck the blood of animals", vampires. so... i went to a sports bar and watched the byu/utah game with my husband instead. and i don't regret my decision. but i assure you, my sister-in-law regrets hers.
all that said, to each her own.
I agree with you Mrs. Dub--it was awkward and I keep trying to figure out why grown women like it! I understand why teen girls do--handsome, unattainable, rich guy falls for "average" girl. I came home and told my husband I worry for all the girls who put Bella up as their role model--she does nothing heroic and falls in love with a dangerous guy who is a bit creepy--stalking her, "protecting" her, all the while resisting the urge to kill her--what kind of message is that sending to young women?
Yes I did see it.
No I did not like it. For one, the teen girls in the theater made me want to gag. What's worse, I think I was the only one in the entire room who didn't like the movie. (This comes from a girl who liked the books, except for the last one.) I did not understand who in their right mind would want to salivate over Robert Pattinson. I still cannot get over how they thought he was the best man for the job. I thought Jacob was cute enough, but his teeth were too white. The make-up was overdone on the vampires, and Jasper looked a little too scary for me.
I think the movie definitely had some good points, though. I thought many actors played the parts well, like Bella, along with Charlie, Jessica, and Mike. I thought it was a well-made movie.
Overall I have no desire to see this movie again. I also have no desire to re-read the books. But I will say I don't feel I completely wasted my money with the movie. Hope that makes sense.
Havent read it, haven't watched it, don't intend to.
I'm with Young Family :P It doesn't even sound interesting.
I didn't go the first day because I had read so many bad reviews. But I figured my sister still wanted to go, so I went prepared. It was pretty awful. I enjoyed myself because the theater was empty and my sister and I chatted and guffawed our way through it. The acting was awful...Edward is not attractive. The make up and hair dye jobs are dreadful. Jacob's teeth literally blinded us.
I enjoyed the book because the writing took me back to high school, and the excitement of liking a guy and feeling like a loser myself. But the movie was pretty darn bad. That said, I enjoyed myself because my sister and I discussed our way through the movie.
i liked it. i thought he was hot. like super hot.
haven't seen the movie yet... i will see it, but i may just wait for dvd now that opening weekend is long gone, and all of my premonitions came true - the acting was poor; the movie sucked; the plot ran thin...
the books made me angry, as they idolized the lamest, weakest, most insecure teenage girl in history. seriously, bella swan is too emo for her face, and she shouldn't be anyone's role model. if i were a parent, i would possibly ban this series from my teenage daughters (and i don't believe in censorship)... it's worse than america's next top model (and the like) that pressure girls into attempting to attain an unrealistic body image... at least those girls are trying to be confident even if they hate themselves. bella swan basks in her lack of confidence and self-hatred.
I have NO DESIRE to read or watch Twilight--not only does it not interest me, I've heard they get slightly racey and heated in some parts of the books. If I am going to lower my standards, it's going to be for quality literature and movies! (That's a joke--sort of.:))
P.S. Go and see FIREPROOF instead--AWESOME and UPLIFTING!
rob and i saw it on thanksgiving and laughed almost the who way through at how corny it was.
and robert pattinson's hair is INSANE! if i were to through myself at him, it would be with a pair of scissors just so i could cut his hair.
come on! it's so big!
basically, i hated it but at least i got some good laughs.
I read the books, I enjoyed them. My teenager wanted to go the movie and so we did. I liked it. Not as well as the book, but hey when you are trying to get on common ground with your teenager-well it wasn't bad.
I haven't read any of the books although I imagine I will someday; I have heard/read a wide range of reviews of the film so if I ever see it I will go into it with low expectations. Your review is entertaining as always! I am happy for S. Meyer's success, but it won't be long before the market is longing for some new teen novels... a la Mrs. Dub & Ginny... how's that project coming along??
I read all four books and they were okay. They were an easy pretty mindless read. Some of the content did get a little racy and I would not let my teenage daughter read them.
I have not seen the movie yet since I don't see the point in spending that much money to see a movie I am not dying to see. The neighbor says the acting is bearable but the special affects are terrible and actually quite laughable which makes me want to see it even less.
I read the books because 1. I love to read, and 2. My mom and my sister were reading them (and seemingly every other girl/woman around me).
I wasn't impressed. They are not written well.
If I'm going to spend hours of my life reading something, I want to be inspired, educated, motivated and/or entertained. I want strong characters, great dialogue, and powerful English in my books; Twilight didn't do anything for me. (Some suggestions for really, really good modern literature? "The Glass Castle," "Three Cups of Tea," "The Kiterunner.")
However, what's the target audience -- tweenage girls, right? In fairness, there were movies I LOVED when I was 14, and I catch them now on TBS or TNT and they were the worst movies ever made. And I read the babysitter's club series religiously and that is seriously awful writing. But it helped me love books, and if Twilight helps these girls love reading, I just think that's a good thing.
So when 10-16 year old girls love the books and/or movie, that makes sense to me. I'm excited to see them reading books, rather than texting or face booking or watching The Hills. When moms read the books to bond with daughters in that age group, I think it's a sign of a good mom. When women read the books and can take it at face value -- an entertaining read with no substance, I think that's fine. When women who are 20 and older are obsessed? That's just sad.
Too funny. I actually posted my review today too, and it was SOOOOO cheesy. I also think that Pattinsons is extremely unattractive.
And don't let my little profile pic fool you. I am not a fan of the books.
If you don't take it too seriously, it's pretty entertaining. Just like the books, the movie was not the best ever written, but come on - it's a story about teen vampire love. It's all about entertainment, not great literature. If you're going to read the books or watch the movie, just go into it with managed expectations and you might enjoy yourself.
I agree with meili. managed expectaions: it IS YA-fiction & we all knew that before we started reading the books... same with the movie. didn't we all KNOW it would be mostly teenagers obsessed with edward?
there were things I didn't like about the books/movie, but all in all I thought they were entertaining & good enough to read all 2000+ pages of the series.
I needed something lighter than kite runner (that's why I picked up Twilight in the first place - kite runner traumatized me, although it was an excellent)...
uh, and I actually liked the movie. of course it didn't come out exactly how IIIIIIIIIII would have made the movie or how I imagined things in my head, but I thought it was good. not academy award-winning... but good. entertaining.
p.s. edward's hair is WAY better in the movie than what he does with it in real-life. did you see him on ellen? yikes.
I am amazed at how strongly people feel about these books. In some parts of cyberspace, arguments become so passionate that you'd think we were fighting over Obama vs. McCain again!
I didn't read the books, but all the girls in my neighborhood did. So when they invited me to go see the movie with them, I went, just to be polite. I laughed a lot, but am not sure whether or not it was supposed to be funny.
Mostly I was shocked that the theater was packed to the rafters with WOMEN. There were probably only four teenage girls in attendance (I looked around and counted)! And when Edward came on the scene a wave of cheers rose from GROWN WOMEN'S throats. It was weird. I mean, they DO realize he's a teenager, right?
It was an entertaining night though, and provided fodder for plenty of conversation (I mean jokes) with my husband, so it wasn't a complete loss.
I haven't read the books nor have I seen the movie. But I think the most disturbing thing is that I heard on the radio this morning that Robert Pattinson hasn't washed his hair in SIX WEEKS.
another comment. i have seen about 50,000 movies that were worse. hello?! made of honor.
LOVED the books.... LOVED the movie... no i'm not a teenage girl!
AMEN to "awkward". Read the books, saw the movie...I gave it a "meh".
And Robert Pattinson was REALLY hot as Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter. As Edward? Not so much.
I'm apparently in the minority here, but I love the books, I've read them all twice and I'm on my third reading of the series at present. I loved the movie. I took my husband with me to see it the next day and he loved it as well. And I love Robert Pattinson, in some strange weird way. And yes, the character of Edward is 17 (technically 108) but Rob is 22. Still too young for me at 29, but at least not illegal.
I thought the acting was good. I was actually impressed with the chemistry. Jacob's wig was a little ridiculous and Jasper's character a bit overdone, but overall I loved it. I'm planning to go see it again before Christmas and I'm eagerly awaiting the DVD release in April.
Bella's not a great role model, this is true, but I see so much of myself at that age in her. Heck, I even met my husband at 17 and we got married when I was 18. It's a modern day fairytale. How many fairytales have heroines that are actually good role models? That being said, it's rare today that you find a series you can enjoy with no premarital intimacy, that promotes monogamous love and chastity. It is however, a very sexy series. (And I agree that the movie hair is MUCH better than what Rob does with it in real life.)
Overall, I think this is just going to have to be one of those take it or leave it type of movies. I did hate the screaming during the movie...I paid good money to see and hear the actors, not the screaming fans. During the first showing I went to, there was a girl sitting behind my friend that literally sobbed through the whole movie. That I don't understand. It's a nice escape from reality and may even convince my husband to pick up a book.
Proud member of Team Edward and mom of four (but did NO screaming in the movie) LOL
read the first book, didn't care for it. haven't thought about it since, didn't and won't see the movie. i'd rather see Australia. or madagascar 2.
I liked it, but it wasn't a shining moment for their hair and makeup crew.
I just took it at face value - yes it is a teenage vampire flick - and I liked it. Sure, it was low budget and there were some casting, special effects, and makeup issues, but I loved Edward and Bella. I thought Kristen Stewart actually made Bella less pathetic than she was on paper. Everyone I've talked to has said it was better on second viewing, so I'll be going back for seconds.
Ok, so I'm officially de-lurking myself (Hi Dubs, I'm Brittany) because I LOVED the movie. Not as much as the book, but it was easy for me to overlook the low budget stuff and just swoon. I got a major kick out of all the awkward moments and I think they did a decent job of making the book come to life! I will probably fork over more money to go see again in the theater! Call me cheesey or just a hopeless single 26 year old romantic!
I enjoyed the books. They were a fun read, not great literature. They were written for a YA audience. I have not seen the movie. I don't go to the movies very often, and I'm not thrilled with the reviews. I might rent it when it comes out on DVD.
I went to see it with friends because they told me it was a comedy. I agree, it was hilarious! I reviewed it here.
I have seen Twilight twice (better the second time. You know, once you have already laughed at the not-supposed-to-be-laughed-at parts), and I agree with EVERYTHING you said....but I still loved it. Why is that?
I actually loved Rob Pattinson. Someone I know saw him on Melrose this weekend and went and talked to him. Apparently he turned bright red and was really bashful, that made me love him more.
And what was up with Jasper? I love book-Jasper, but movie-Jasper? What was that?
i saw the movie first on a whim and thought it was lame. some parts were interesting but it was like a long music video.
and then i kept thinking about it and then i read all 4 books this week. they certainly aren't grand literature, but i had the best time reading them. funny, ridiculous, melodramatic. lots of long poignant glances. the characters are weak. there are about a gabillion holes in the plot. but that's part of why i liked it. there was much to laugh at. i thought the first book was the best, it stayed most true to form as a high school style book. but the 4 one sucked. and i'm still mad about it.
This movie was a flop for me:
1) I had to check the time multiple instances during this movie, wondering how much longer I had to endure
2) I don't think it was supposed to be a comedy, but I laughed out loud repeatedly.
3) Supposedly vampires should be breathtakingly beautiful. These were not. Maybe it was the face painting (and no neck painting) that did it for me.
4) Bella seemed even more co-dependent in the movie than in the books.
I'd really like 2 hours of my life back.
My favorite thing about this post is how very serious everyone is about a Tween work of FICTION!
Everything about this empire is meant to be entertaining, but if it's not for you then that's cool.
The books are entertaining; not classics. Bella's entertaining; not iconic. The movie was entertaining; not academy awards material.
I've liked it all, but than again I had very low expectations going into all of this, so I've been pleasantly surprised.
PS-My favorite thing about the movie is the great job they did of capturing the initial awkwardness of high school romance. The staring, the lame banter, and the prolonged silence - nailed it.
I have not seen it, but plan to. I was determined NOT get sucked in like everyone I knew. But, at a ward activity when everyone was talking about it, even the "old" ladies, they convinced me to read them. I liked the story. But, I am not a crazy fanatic about it. I do want to see the film, but have heard mixed reviews. So, you know, whatever.
Just wanted to clarify a few things, 'cause, um, why not?
1. I know it's a YA book. I'm happy see teens READING anything, including the back of a cereal box, so I can't really complain about its content for them. Plus, I think Stephenie Meyer has a gift for capturing the feeling of a new crush. Some complained the books are too sexy, but I could have gone for some more nookie (in the movie, too). There's just not enough gratuitous lipping in this world.
2. It wasn't the worst movie I've ever seen. Mannequin 2 was way worse. But it wasn't as good as lots of other teen movies I've seen and enjoyed (more than I probably should as an adult). At least Bring it On was tongue-in-cheek, and that was still pretty bad.
3. I think Robert Pattinson is very cute; I just thought someone who wanted to blend in with teenagers would keep his hair short enough to clear doorways.
4. Maybe they were going for awkward?
I posted on my loathing of how Twilight has taken over everything. Loathing is too strong... maybe annoyance. I haven't seen the movie yet.. I might drag my hubs to it with me to torment him.. make him prove his love to me.
Love your blog btw!
Oh, and ...
5. Maybe people who haven't read the books liked the movie better?
6. I think all the hype/hatred stems from the book being just good enough (and engrossing) that people want them to be even better. (And feel compelled to outline just how.) And the movie was bad enough to do that mediocrity injustice. You dig?
thanks, as always mrs. dub, for a GREAT entry that made me not only laugh my panties off, but also feel better about being one of the few that haven't wasted time/energy/money on this whole teenage craze. i am, after all, nearly thirty-one years old and should probably be dedicating reading/viewing time to something a bit more...how shall i say, worth my time. cheers!
saw it, and thought it was for Teeny-Boppers. But the other women in the group LOVED it!
hee hee... I loved Twilight, and tolerated the rest of the books. I really liked the Midnight Sun chapters posted on her website (Twilight from Edwards perspective) but yea, you're right on with the movie. It was awkward, laughable dialog, and I wanted to go wipe off that lipstick and white makeup so bad, the hair didn't even bother me half as much as the make up. But, for some odd reason, I will see it again.
I thought the casting was awful. Edward should not be metrosexual. And he should be, you know, good looking. Speaking of good looking, could Rosalie look more common? Isn't she supposed to be beautiful and look less white trash?
I really felt like the whole thing was a parody. The makeup on Carlisle and Edward was over the top. THey're vampires, not drag queens.
My comment is to the person who thinks that Bella is not a good role model for girls. Um, is Harry Potter a good role model for boys? Can we just enjoy books with out trying to model ourselves after the "characters" in them???
Here from AM.
I saw it last night, and your assessment pretty much hits everything I was thinking. (Down to the student body and white makeup problems.) I hadn't read the books, and now I definitely won't. I was bored. And I felt old. I kept thinking maybe that's why I didn't get it.
BTW, did it seem like the actor playing Edward was doing a Christopher Walken impression??
cassie - i love, love, love the HP series but am not a fan of the harry potter character. he's kind of a big baby... but in my mind, at least the books are very well-written. jk rowling is fabulous with the english language. twilight, in my opinion, is not very well-written (i'm with the others who mentioned that), so it's harder for me to overlook the fact that i don't like the main character.
most of my comment was overly exaggerated (though it is true that the books annoyed me)... for instance, i would never ban a vacuous teenage series from a teenage girl. i was just being dramatic (like miss bella swan) for drama's sake.
"Edward is a vampire. And Bella is one of the most pathetic protagonists to ever capture the youthful hearts of America. But we all want them to make sweet pasty love, so we love them regardless."
And there you have it--the recipe that is the Twilight Saga.
This is why I read you, Mrs. Dub. THIS is why I read you.
I liked it. But maybe it was because I had been house bound so long with vertigo, it was just nice to get out of the house and see something other than the four walls in my bedroom. However - Edwards eyebrows! They bugged me SO much!
The most fun of the movie for me was when there's that startling part where the vampire jumps on the car and somone in the audience screamed. It was the most excitement in the whole thing.
I could NOT have said any of that better myself.
I was the opposite. I liked his acting and thought hers were.... lacking.
WAS lacking. oops.
i loved the awkwardness. for me that's what the books were about and i did laugh out loud in several parts ...only to realize i was the only one in the theater laughing. (that happens a lot. apparently my sense of humor is off.)
but i loved it. i also went in with very, very low expectations. in fact, i didn't think i wanted to see it until i heard the reviews from some friends. and i specifically did not re-read the books so that i could enjoy it more instead of thinking, "they left that part out." or "that's not in the book."
i also loved the cinematography. very cold and creepy. i loved the creepiness. it was a dark and creepy movie. loved it. and even liked the music--especially iron & wine.
hated jacob's wig. hated it. hate. hate. hate. he looks better in "my own worst enemy" starring my teen crush christian slater.
i didn't swoon at the first kiss like many ...because, like, i get kissed like that when ever i want. mr. r is good like that. (whoa TMI.)
but i will watch it again. i may never read the books again--seeing as i really only enjoyed the first, but the movie was fun. it didn't change my life, but it was entertaining.
I'm way late on this one, but did nobody (besides my husband, yes, he came to see it with me, just so I didn't have to see it alone in a town where I don't know anybody but my inlaws) Nobody noticed the Stephanie Meyer cameo? I think that was my favorite thing about the movie, and that was even awkward and obviously placed (her little snipped was really useless, except to show her mug in her own film).
i enjoyed it, more or less. wouldn't go see it again and glad I saw it in a small town where the admission was only 5.25. The choices in my town are $9 or $1.50. nice compromise (;
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